In ancient Latin, ‘Ischia’ means “very small island pearl where boiling hot subterranean magma which did not escape during the last eruption, heats the ground and the water to 98C and so there is always warm water to swim near the beaches, but you can’t get any insurance against volcanic explosion or earthquake or the end of the world”.
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In the Middle Ages, it was an acronym for “International Swimming Commune Hot Is Appreciated”  and latterly it has become a byword for picture perfect film set location with no paparazzi, sweet and charming people, beaches of Elysium, fantastic food and unbelievable climate where everything grows like subtropical and spas agogo galore.

There are many people here who go about in white towelling dressing gowns, which is part of their ancient cultural legacy. These are mostly elderly folk and they hold that the dressing gowns make them live longer than other mortals.  Most of the inhabitants of Ischia live to the age of 119 years and they eat huge quantities of spaghetti with lots of garlic and small cherry tomatoes and olives and olive oil and anchovies and parmesan cheese and fried fish and secret herbs. And everyone says “Bon Giorno” to everyone they pass and they stand and converse and gesticulate loudly.

Big glass of chilled white frizzante wine from Benevento, almost champagne. The clocks go round very quickly in Ischia because time is faster and so it is really hard to keep track of time passing and life unfolding so rapidly.

And schools of little white fishes leaping gracefully out of the water and diving back in, like juniors training for Olympics. And jumping into green translucid water with a splash, from the gunwhale of my yacht and sinking down in gurgling white bubbles and then up again to look for my cap. Truly it is bliss to basque in the full spectrum cognition of such luxurious sensations and to be alive under the sky and in the wonderful water at the same time, bobbing about.

And the delicious 3 bean dish with white beans and brown beans and squashed lentils. And Paolo and Pietro, the handsome young waiters in long black aprons with pinstripe bibs, who were so attentive and put on a comic charm banter performance worthy of La Scala, thrice daily. And cruising around the whole island with a captain who made us lunch and then spent all afternoon chatting and enchanting the ladies with amusing remarks and anecdotes and playful teasing gestures that really get on your nerves after 3 hours.

All the mountainsides are completely built-up and the roads be exceedingly steep and narrow and winding and totally paved or cobbled.  Buses could not fit in these lanes, but they drive anyway.  The first ever marble pavement was laid in Ischia in approx 5000 BC and the first ever street lighting with oil lamps was installed by Messrs A. Ladin in 4500BC.  In November they close down and go to Berlin to earn money.

Now we need some serious help from you.  Dear readers wikiblog needs to know who were the Saracens and where did they come from and where did they go? And what did they believe in? Because they seem to be the ancestors of the Ischians, but, as a Brit, I was only taught that they were the antichrist and we had to kill them during the crusades.  Was Morgan Freeman a Saracen in Robin Hood?  He knew so much about medicine and explosives and all things scientific; and he was wise and dignified and courageous and had really GSOH.  But they did good things in these islands like building big walls and banning graffiti and skateboards.